What do you do when what makes sense doesn’t make sense? Just two days — 48 hours — after my dad died in March 2020, I received a telephone call from my acting supervisor asking when I might return to work. I knew at that very moment that I’d quit my corporate job. With absolutely no disrespect directed towards […]
Remaining anchored amid life’s winds is fundamental to enduring this thing called ‘life.’ It’s a paraphrase of a saying my dad sometimes shared with me as an adult, especially in moments when I felt emotionally deflated and spiritually discouraged. Like the time I mentally prepared for a job I didn’t receive. Or when I struggled […]
Years into my grief journey, I finally found myself embracing the inconvenience of grief. I reached a point where I couldn’t fit grief into the nooks and crannies of my life or pretend that it wasn’t a constant companion. No, grief had no regard for my needing to focus from 9-5 or that I couldn’t […]
When the holiday calls — Father’s Day, in this case — you have no choice but to answer, even as you grieve. I know, I know, my friend. This absolutely sucks! Yet what choice do you have as a grieving heart? Option 1 is to insert yourself in bubble wrap to insulate yourself from being […]
Time alone isn’t the answer … when it comes to grieving, at least. This fact is countercultural in many ways. Let me explain. All too often in the face of loss, other well meaning supporters make the statement, “You’ll feel better in time” or “Time heals all wounds.” On the surface, this makes sense, particularly […]
As a person who’s grieving, you’ve likely heard others express how important it is to be patient with yourself in grief. Sounds great, right? But have you ever thought about why it’s so hard to exercise self-compassion, including patience with yourself, as you grieve? Well, I have. Here, I’ll share a couple of insights I’ve […]
No one can grieve for you, my friend. Ahem (clearing my throat) … please don’t shoot the messenger. Let me explain. After my mom first died in 2012, I found myself feeling angry about friends and family not showing up in ways I appreciated. Some called when they learned of her death. A few stayed […]
Let’s face it. There’s no manual for how to show up for someone who’s grieving. While a comfortable wish, this simply isn’t the case. Grief is messy and complicated, as well as downright uncomfortable to sit in. And the tendency to want to avoid the pain associated with grief is human and understandable. At the […]
Kids aren’t little adults … especially when it comes to grieving. Over the past 25 years, I’ve spent time with hundreds of families in the most fragile and devastating of moments. Parents whose children were diagnosed with life-threatening illnesses. Children facing life-altering diagnoses. Families forced to pivot at unexpected times. Households disrupted by death. Naturally, each […]
When health calls, you answer. My phone rang – again, mind you – in March 2020, shortly after my dad died. The suddenness of his death, coupled with my ongoing grappling with my mom‘s death just 7 1/2 years prior, shook me to the core. In contrast to my attempts to avoid grief altogether when […]
