Remaining anchored amid life’s winds is fundamental to enduring this thing called ‘life.’ It’s a paraphrase of a saying my dad sometimes shared with me as an adult, especially in moments when I felt emotionally deflated and spiritually discouraged. Like the time I mentally prepared for a job I didn’t receive. Or when I struggled […]
Time alone isn’t the answer … when it comes to grieving, at least. This fact is countercultural in many ways. Let me explain. All too often in the face of loss, other well meaning supporters make the statement, “You’ll feel better in time” or “Time heals all wounds.” On the surface, this makes sense, particularly […]
No one can grieve for you, my friend. Ahem (clearing my throat) … please don’t shoot the messenger. Let me explain. After my mom first died in 2012, I found myself feeling angry about friends and family not showing up in ways I appreciated. Some called when they learned of her death. A few stayed […]
Kids aren’t little adults … especially when it comes to grieving. Over the past 25 years, I’ve spent time with hundreds of families in the most fragile and devastating of moments. Parents whose children were diagnosed with life-threatening illnesses. Children facing life-altering diagnoses. Families forced to pivot at unexpected times. Households disrupted by death. Naturally, each […]
Over nine years into my grief journey following my mom’s death and just shy of two years following my dad’s death, I’ve discovered the value inherent in leading yourself through rituals. What are rituals? Merriam-Webster defines a ritual as follows: “an act or series of acts regularly repeated in a set precise manner.” A grief […]
Sometimes along the grief journey, you simply have to trust those around you. I learned this head-on after the death of my mom, when those closest to me recognized that I was falling apart. In my view, however, everything was “just fine.” Despite the fact that I’d walked straight into the darkest season of my […]
The year, 2013. Just two months after awakening to discover my mom’s lifeless body next to me and my brother, I stood before a class of academically hungry doctoral students. My role, Associate Professor. Each breath I took seemed insurmountable and forced in that moment. The problem? I was leading while grieving. Before I share […]
Isn’t it time to adopt a new definition of resilient leadership? My quick answer: a resounding YES. My longer answer, however, is that we need to explore the concept of resilience. This, I believe, will help us better understand its role in leadership. Psychology Today defines ‘resilience’ as “the psychological quality that allows some people […]
“Are you just seen or truly known?” This was the question my therapist posed to me last year as I explained how misunderstood I felt in my grief. In the midst of coping with the impact of a global pandemic, my dad died of sudden heart failure. And after nearly 8 years of navigating grief […]
Have you ever wondered how to decompress after experiencing a grief trigger? First things first. Let me define what ‘grief trigger’ means. A grief trigger is basically anything that sparks memories of a loss. It’s not uncommon to think of birthdays, anniversaries, the holiday season, or special events as triggers for grief. What may not […]
